Goal Setting and Goal Getting
Goals and I have a complicated relationship. On the one hand, I love to-do lists and agendas and sticky notes and writing things down so I can feel accomplished once I take a highlighter through them. But on the other hand, when asked to outline short-term and long-term goals that would take more foresight than a day or even a week, I was at a loss.
Contrary to my affinity for sticky notes and colorful pens, I am absolutely not a planner. I don’t enjoy making plans because if you make plans, you have to stick with the plans, and what if you get to the plans and no longer want to do them or can’t? Having an escape readily available is ideal; as is having options, and plans are not always conducive to that. So when asked to outline goals for myself, I struggled because once I committed them to paper, once they were more than thoughts bouncing around in my head, it was all over. Either I reach them, or I don’t. I fail, or I don’t. But I could never fail to accomplish a goal if I never made one to begin with, right?
Why set goals?
Needless to say, I’m still staring at a blank sheet of prompts for goals I haven’t made yet, and am afraid even to try and commit to. I know how powerful writing is, and I know what the studies show. Those who write down their goals are more likely to achieve them, and those who vividly write out and describe their goals are even more likely to succeed. It makes perfect sense; what good is a map if you don’t know where you are or where you’re going?
How to set goals
Write them out
So if I know all this, then what’s the hang-up? Just write them down! I mean, we all know how, it’s harped on repeatedly in school, therapy, workplaces, it’s all about setting SMART goals, goals that are:
Specific
Measurable
Achievable
Relevant
Time-bound
For example: This year, I will publish at least 12 blog posts; I will accomplish this by posting once a month.
Well, there’s one goal down that wasn’t so hard. The hard part is following through and not procrastinating every month but scheduling checkpoints and sticking to them. And the most challenging part of all is not beating myself up if I fail to accomplish or fall behind schedule on this or any goal I set for myself.
Get accountable
Besides writing down your goals, another way to stay motivated is to tell someone. Accountability gives you that little extra push of outside pressure. If the paper knows your goal exists and another person does, then it’s not so easy to let your commitment slip. At the same time, there’s a fine line between doing something for your benefit and doing something out of obligation. If the goal is no longer profiting you, it might be time to reevaluate.
Tips to goal getting
Don’t overthink it
The most important thing about goal setting is to remember that it is only the first step. I tend to spend so much time planning out my goals and how I will reach them that I never actually start working towards them. I like the planning stage; it’s comfortable and doesn’t have those pesky bits of reality messing everything up. But there’s no true satisfaction or sense of accomplishment till you reach the end, and whether or not it goes as planned, at least you tried and hopefully gained something valuable from the experience to add to your tool kit when going for your next goal.
It’s never that simple
To a certain extent, smart goals oversimplify things, especially when it’s a personal goal. You take this lofty dream or vision and condense it down to fit the confines of a couple of sentences. No wonder we often find ourselves discouraged when we don’t reach it. It’s so black and white and neat on paper, but things are never so simple in execution. For one, what about all the other responsibilities and activities we are splitting our focus between? We attempt to tackle all these things and wonder why we aren’t making the progress we want. When planning goals, leave yourself some room for error; expect it upfront, so you’re ready to allow yourself the space to get back on track when it comes.
A little change at a time
And lastly, when it comes to goal setting and goal getting, a little change over time adds up. So take things one step at a time and try not to become overwhelmed by looking at how much you have left till the finish line. It may be more of a slow burn for some goals, but you’ll get there, and when you do, it will be worth it, so keep chipping away at it! And now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to take my own advice and finally start to set some goals.